let us live with our children

Friedrich Froebel's first emphasis was on preparing young mothers in their roles of providing the foundation of their children's education. When he said "let us live with our children," he was not suggesting that we honor their every whim, but that we bring them into our lives, and that we take time to enter theirs through play. There are special things that a mother does with her children, and there are special things that a father can do as well.

A friend of mine, Frederick Peace tells the story of letting his five year old change the oil in his car. A friend of his was shocked. "How can you let a 5 year old kid do that?" "Why not?" Frederick answered, "he's watched me do it often enough." And there you have an important lesson on education in a nutshell.

One of the attendees of my webinar asked a question about homeschooling that I know I failed to answer adequately. Home is truly the first school and by all reckoning the most important one, regardless of whether a child ever goes to a private or public school at a later time. In the home, the child develops his or her attitudes about learning, and answers important questions about self: "Am I important?" "Am I valued?" "Am I responsible?" "Am I one who contributes to the well-being of others?" "Am I smart?" "Can I be trusted?" These are questions a child has most likely answered for himself long before the first day of school, by being given responsibilities in and around the home.

And so what happens within a child when he or she is trusted and expected to participate in things important to daily life? Cook, clean, plant, harvest, make, fix, build, sew, make music, make noise, get messy, play, have fun. If the use of the hands makes us smart, home is where it begins. Regardless of what happens in schools, what happens in homes through the guiding hands of parents and grandparents is of the greatest importance. Fathers and grandfathers in particular have an important role to play in all this.